This is the musing of a software developer. If
you are or have not been in the profession, some of these might appear jargon
to you. I have tried to write it in as simple a language as I can, but still
you ought to be thankful to God Almighty for your absence of knowledge on
some/all of these issues. Believe me, you are much better off NOT knowing all
these than those unlucky ones like me who see lines of code floating around in
dreams…..
Somewhere in the wee hours of
the morning, long before the sun has risen over the horizon, in the dark alleys
of a software company, an unfortunate soul sits away staring at his computer
monitor, his hands deftly navigating the contours of a keyboard attached. That
harangued soul, I wish, were my worst enemy, but unfortunately happens to be
me. Myself.
The clacking of the keys is
the only noise in the entire hallway, which is deserted sans a solitary me. I
peck away at the keyboard incessantly, unaware of my surroundings. Completely
focused on what I do. And finally, a few hours later, the beginnings of a smile
begin to creep up on my face. At last, my code is working. An almost surreal
feeling. Priceless, exactly the kind that my MasterCard cannot pay with. And
finally, double checking everything, I send off my piece of code for reviewing
by my peers. Also known in colloquial terminology as code review.
That done, I head to the parking garage to pick up my car and head home. On the
way down to garage, I try to remember whether I did have my dinner, or whether
the last meal I had in the day was a piece of toast for breakfast.
Sometime after I reach home,
I fall asleep on my sofa. And long after the sun has risen and the world around
me is busy with its morning activities, my alarm chirps me to life. I brush my
teeth, finish with my morning ablutions before I head to office. My first task
- to check peer feedback on my code review. As I grab my morning coffee and
head to my desk and open my computer hoping to see that my code has gotten the
requisite sign offs. Or at least a few comments so that I have something to
work on in the morning.
But alas, that is not to be.
Indeed, I should have known. The very revered peers of mine were busily ensconced
in their respective worlds, my request for reviewing of my code was nothing but
a mere distraction. And so there I was, after toiling way past midnight, now at
the mercy of my colleagues and seniors. If only they could give me some
feedback. But fear not, it is not the first time that yours truly is facing
this situation. With nothing better to do, I turn on the web browser. Social
and anti-social media are the buzzwords as I delve into the pleasantries of
life with friends and family from up close and afar. Cameth the lunch hour and
I, having all the lavish time in the world, decide to skip the office cafeteria
and entertain myself to a fabulous lunch outside in some restaurant.
I come back after a very
sumptuous lunch and open my system. My mind is delving into the multiple
possibilities of how to creatively spend my time in the afternoon in the office
while appearing to my manager and the rest of the pack that I am, like a loyal
servant, hard at work. No sooner has the computer opened up, I see my code
review all lit up like the lights on a Christmas tree.
And there, after addressing
the plethora of comments that flew in from left, right and center making me
appear more of an idiot and less of a software developer, I finally manage to
commit my code to the system. Feeling triumphant, like a warrior after a
successful battle, I head to the kitchenette to celebrate my success with a cup
of coffee. I stand near the machine while it splutters and cranks out the
coffee I believe I so richly deserve. The mobile phone in my pocket vibrates.
It is a new email, my change has caused a build break. Muttering all the
expletives which I imbibed as a part of my collegiate education, I rush back to
my office. The vicious cycle begins all over again…..
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